WARNING! This post is a bit of a “rant” but hopefully contains some useful marketing points…
…as well as providing a degree of amusement for you.
It was prompted by a number of things…
…firstly an example from the latest edition of “No B.S. Ruthless Management Of People And Profits” by Dan Kennedy. More about that in a moment.
Then I came across an article in the UK “Daily Telegraph”…
“Is Michael Owen now Britain’s funniest man?”
(link may be behind a paywall)
…which mentions this bizarre ad…
“His new Lost in Translation-style Japanese whisky commercial is another parody-defying joy. Advertising single malt Spey, Owen drones lines like ‘The spirit of a warrior courses through me’, while sounding less like a warrior than a suicidal loss adjuster. ‘I always celebrate my wins with Spey whisky’ fibs Owen.”
Quite.
Apparently, Owen has been pretty busy…
“…but he’ll flog any old tut. He’s advertised Jaguar, Persil, Pro Evo, Nestlé Sporties cereal and Tissot Swiss watches.”
Now, Michael Owen was once a genuine sporting hero, a deadly striker for England and Liverpool. Sadly,that time is long gone and in the twilight of his career Owen seemed far more interested in his race horses than in turning in a half-decent performance for the hapless clubs who ended up paying his inflated wages. My point is that there can’t be too many people around who see Michael Owen as someone to admire, look up to and magically emulate by knocking back a particular brand of scotch.
And yet…clearly he is raking in the readies from a string of ads…from big companies advised by their mainstream advertising agencies. Of course, these ads might be delivering an extraordinary return on investment and boosting sales! Somehow, I don’t think anyone is actually measuring the numbers to see if that’s the case.
One thing Michael Owen does seem to be very successful at, of course, is…promoting Michael Owen! There’s a lesson in that.
Back to the Dan Kennedy book “No B.S. Ruthless Management Of People And Profits”. Dan kicks off the first chapter with an example of something that…well, infuriates him. A brochure from a university’s school of management pitching a high-priced seminar titled “Managing the New Workforce: Leadership and Strategy”. Dan fumes…
“This brochure, as well as the seminar it pitches, represents everything that’s wrong with at least 90% of everything being fed to business owners and executives about managing people. It is, in a word B.S. – but let me demonstrate.”
“First, it is chock full of vague, meaningless gobbledygook. Nice sounding, until you critically anlayse it.”
Dan continues with a number of examples of “corporate-speak” and then gets to a critical point…
“Now here’s what is NOT mentioned anywhere in this brochure: managing people for PROFIT. I read every word very carefully…The word ‘profit’ does not appear. Not even once.”
In this case, Dan is talking about managing people (and by extension, profits) but the same criticisms apply to “at least 90% of everything being fed to business owners and executives about marketing and advertising“.
Full confession time. I am the proud holder of an M.B.A. from one of the top U.K. business schools and I thoroughly enjoyed the two years I spent on that programme. I learned a lot and it certainly gave me career opportunities that I probably wouldn’t have had otherwise.
BUT…what I was taught about marketing was very much from an academic angle. Nothing about direct response marketing and nothing about…sales or selling. That last realisation struck me after coming back from an interview with a major investment bank for a sales job. The interview had gone quite well but I realised that I knew little or nothing about selling!
So I browsed around the school book store and came across “How To Master The Art Of Selling” by Tom Hopkins. To say I was stunned would be something of an understatement. Here was a seemingly parallel world of business that until then had been hidden from me. Looking back, it started me on a path that eventually led to the world of direct response marketing and copywriting, albeit with a few detours along the way.
I digress. The point however, and I say this with much sadness, is that mainstream business education is a big part of what’s wrong with mainstream business. In particular, marketing and advertising as carried out by mainstream business.
And it’s not as if the right information, strategies and techniques are not available…
…as I was reminded, once again, a few weeks ago at a very entertaining and informative evening featuring the great Drayton Bird. Drayton should need no introduction. Suffice to say he is one of the greatest living authorities in the field of marketing, especially direct response marketing. The late, great David Ogilvy had this to say…
“Drayton Bird knows more about direct marketing than anyone in the world. His book about it is pure gold.”
And Drayton has not spent his career toiling away in the obscurity of, say, the mail-order business. Rather, the bulk of his career was spent in the mainstream world working for large companies like American Express. And yet…his advice often falls on deaf ears.
Of course, for those who care to look, the timeless principles for success in advertising and marketing were set out by the great Claude Hopkins in the classic “Scientific Advertising”, published way back in 1923. If you’re looking for an insightful introduction to these principles, consider my own book…
“Scientific Advertising In The 21st Century”
…of which Ross Boardman kindly says…
“Overall this is a very important aid to reading Hopkins but also stands on its own two feet as a reminder of the message. This makes the original Hopkins text much more understandable. A great guide and certainly a book to be re-read several times as well.”
Time to wrap up this rant…
…BEWARE! As an entrepreneur or business owner…be very careful about emulating what goes on in the world of mainstream marketing. Big companies have deep pockets and can survive a great deal of marketing idiocy. In many cases they make money despite their marketing. You most likely don’t have that luxury.